The Big Blue

Film Review

I had never seen this film (or even heard of it before) but I can safely say that I won’t ever be watching it again. Having said that, I did enjoy the pleasant scenery – particularly the Greek and Italian coastlines. After watching the opening scenes, I was worried the whole film was going to be black and white, which I think would have been a waste. The only actor I recognised in this film was Jean Reno. It took me ages to realise that he was playing an Italian and not a Frenchman.

This film is just shy of 3 hours long and honestly… it is an astonishing achievement that Luc Besson managed to stretch out so little plot over so much time. I thought the entire film was painfully dull. I found it hard to care about the characters. Or the plot. Perhaps if the film were an hour shorter it wouldn’t have felt like such a chore. I’m sure this could have easily been achieved, especially if they took out all the slow-motion sequences. I was hopeful that the film would get more interesting as it went on, but clearly I was being far too optimistic. I think there were probably some moments where I was supposed to laugh, but alas, nothing came out.

Basically this film is about two friends and rivals, with a bit of a love story thrown in… and some dolphins. At one point the woman is jealous and thinks Jacques is having it away with a dolphin. Actually, maybe she has a point - I’ve never seen a man look so bored during sexual intercourse in the entire history of cinema, before immediately departing to spend the rest of the night with a dolphin.

Jacques finally beats Enzo and he becomes the world record holder for free diving. At the end of the film, Jacques takes Enzo down to the bottom of the sea and drowns him to ensure that his record will never be broken. He presumably feels guilty and goes down to the bottom of the sea again for one last tryst with his sub-aquatic lover to take his mind off Enzo. THE END. Or should I say FIN?

1 violated blowhole out of 5