Crust

When Liam told me he was putting this movie in the jar I almost didn't allow it. How could he manage to find a film that is neither available on DVD, streaming services, torrent sites or putlockers? On the Letterboxd platform the film only had 11 people recorded as having watched it (the number is now at 13 with me and Genevieve). Of course, reading the premise the choice made sense. It sounded like a 'Liam Film' if ever there was one. I must admit though, with the motivating factor in making the film being a tax-scam and the fact that the film has fallen into such obscurity, I was certain this film was going to be a turd. And so, when I told Liam that without access to the film anywhere it just couldn't be included in the jar, I did so with a bit of relief. It just meant that we wouldn't be able to watch what was probably a shit film. Liam resigned and selected an alternate entry for the jar, but just a couple of days later he got in touch telling me to take his choice back out - the son-of-a-bitch had tracked it down.

I'm not sure what corner of the dark-web Liam managed to find this film, but I'm glad he did. The film starts, like any affable British Comedy, in a pub. We are introduced to a bunch of relativity likable characters: Bill, an ex-boxer who now runs a pub and likes wearing a shiny metallic shirt; Steve, a horny young boxer and protege to Bill; Shaz, Steve's sexually bored and morally bankrupt girlfriend, and, my favourite, Hamid 'Anything-U-Need' Choudhury who steals every scene he's in. What a rare treat to hear so many Midlands accents in a film.

The humour, from the off, seemed charming enough, with a group of locals throwing water balloons like a hammer-throw at the back of the pub and of course soaking a random passer-by. I was surprised and happily settling in for a nice, 'goes down well with a cup of tea' gentle British comedy. But like a slippery fish this film kept eluding my expectations: with the introduction of what can only be described as a grotesque giant shrimp like puppet, things only begin to get interesting.

I can totally see why the Japanese loved this film enough for it to spawn a whole genre. I love Japanese cinema because it's so often off the wall mental, and this film completely shares those sensibilities. It's not just the hideous giant shrimp either, though I really can't express how much I fell in love with that thing. There's so many other bizarre moments: the gladiator costumes with cone shaped codpieces; the completely unexplained binbag full of condoms; Hamid Chaudury's friend offering to buy the giant shrimp as a buffet centerpiece; Ulrika Johnson's cameo in which she was only required to lie down with her eyes shut for two minutes; the scene where Bill fucks the shrimp - because that's definitely what was happening in that scene.

Somehow amidst all this weirdness the movie also manages to have some heart. Through his relationship with the shrimp, Bill discovers how lonely he has been and the scene where the shrimp hugs Bill almost brought a tear to my eye. Almost. I appreciated that Steve and his girlfriend didn't end up together; it's refreshing to see an arc where people come to realize that it's probably just better if they aren't together. It's a reality that isn't often portrayed in movies and even less often in such a feel-good manner.

It might have been a case of lowered expectations but I loved this movie - I always appreciate a bit of insanity and this film just kept twisting up its insanity dial as it went on. It's far better than any film made as part of a tax scam has any right to be.

4 urinary specimens in the bar snacks out of 5

I'm very tempted to put Calamari Wrestler in the jar